Man in elevator: (smiles) “Hello! Nice night out.”
Me: (half smile) “Uh, yeah…I guess.” (immediately show disinterest)
When I was in elementary school I remember being too naive and shy to be popular. I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings and always offered to share my lunch with anyone hungry. I saw mean boys and girls and thought “why are they so angry?”. I would never become like that, I promised myself as I probably munched on string cheese or something adorable.
Fast forward to 2017 and I’m upset when my coworkers talk about last nights episode of ‘Vanderpump’ an octave too loudly *eye-roll*. “Kindly STFU I’d rather work from home” I would tell them with my face. But what is up with that? When did I care too much about noise? Who the hell have I become and why did I get this way?
As we get older, we spend more and more time with, well ourselves. You don’t realize your bad habits until they really get bad enough. How will you notice if you’ve already broken a promise you and young-adorable-elementary version of you have made? Today I got into my elevator with my dog and some really nice Pizza Hut guy started talking to me. I felt my instincts immediately activate like all my bitchy cells were communicating with each other that the time to attack for self-defense is right now. As if I was going to make up for all the times I let someone be creepy and get away with it right here right now all in this moment. But I caught myself and offered him a friendly hello back and saw the relief in his face. I mean was it really that hard for me to not act like this guy wanted to murder me? The guy did have pizza after all. Even if he did get weird on me I realize that I didn’t need to automatically turn on my bitchy side for a just-in-case matter. And maybe (just maybe) he’d give me pizza.
It is pretty important to take a moment to give yourself a reality check. Give yourself a good look in the mirror (try not to kiss the glass) and say “hey guy have you become a jerk?”. Are you the kind of person that you want to be? What are you like when no one is looking?
Its time to be the nice fucking guy in the elevator. If someone had to describe you in 3 words, what would it be?
2018 is right around the corner. There’s never been a better time to be the best version of you. For all of our sakes, always be kind.
Queue Meredith Brooks “Bitch”…